


Tightrope

by dreamingjewel



Category: Sleepy Hollow (TV)
Genre: F/F, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-10-28
Updated: 2013-10-28
Packaged: 2017-12-30 18:39:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,553
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1022082
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dreamingjewel/pseuds/dreamingjewel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After the seven year cycle, Abbie still has doubts.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Tightrope

They were at the computer again, whispering furiously. Crane sounding outraged, Jenny telling him to keep reading tapping her foot in an agitated fashion. When she entered the room they both looked up at her. Crane left the room immediately. Jenny slowly shut down the computer and stood in front of her. She looked a little too nonchalant for Abbie’s liking, but Abbie knew her sister pretty well these days, and decided to act casual herself. Offhandedly asked,what the two of them had been up to, although she had a good idea. 

Jenny just shrugged and said,  
“Crane asked for another history lesson. You know he doesn't like to remain ignorant of any subject. The stuff he found in the local library left him with a lot of questions. I was just helping him fill in the gaps” 

“What gaps, exactly” Abbie asked, knowing full well she was not going to like the answer.

“The ones you've been skirting around like: what happened to folks like us after the Revolutionary War, The Civil War, Reconstruction, etcetera. When you walked in we were taking a stroll through those lovely ole miscegenation laws. Plus he’s perturbed and perplexed that in our “enlightened” times there seems to be an ever so slight undercurrent of something quite “unsettling” (Jenny making air quotes) when you two go out sometimes. I just got him up to speed on a bit of history that’s all”

Damn Jenny, Abbie thought furiously, why did she have to tell him? Crane may have been a man ahead of his time, but in this world he lagged behind in every way. Did she think she was doing him a favor showing him the ugliness of the last two-hundred fifty plus years? Crane was quiet these days, and often flinched when Abbie came too near.

Jenny rolled her eyes at Abbie’s silence and palatable discomfort. “Why shouldn't he know? Why should he live in blissful ignorance? We live with it Abbie . We live with it, carry the burden of it, and shoulder it, till we nearly break from the knowledge that we are still judged and found wanting. Why should your precious Lord of light be spared? Did you see the way that blonde girl ignored you at the bar, and made a beeline to him? Pretending she didn’t know you two were together. She sneered at you both and practically spit, when he ignore her overtures. You think he is dense to a lot of things, but he notices even the most subtle slights, and blondie wasn’t subtle, where it concerns you. I just gave him a little context. What’s the harm, anyway? “  
Jenny gave Abbie a raised eyebrow and smirked knowingly

“You’re scared”

Abbie looked down at her hands, and she clenched them as if to fight, but said nothing. Her sister continued,  
“You are always afraid of the truth, even after saving the world; Corbin coddled your tired butt too much.” Jenny said and sucked her teeth “Look, if Young Lochinvar is worth his salt, nothing I show him, nothing I tell him about good ole America will make a bit of difference in your relationship, except his eyes will be open and he’ll hold onto you a little tighter.”

Jenny stepped into Abbie’s personal space.

“Has it ever occurred to you that Crane doesn’t think he’s good enough for you?”

Jenny stepped back and gave her a hard look before throwing up her hands, leaving Abbie standing in the middle of her own living room. Jenny was probably going off in search of Katrina, and they’d disappear to who knows where in Jenny’s beat up car.

Abbie knew in the long run, Jenny was right, but she wasn't ready for that particular conversation. For seven years she and Crane had fought alongside each other, both had survived for the most part intact. There was a friendship was built upon, mutual respect, trust, and, yes, love. It wasn't Jenny giving history lessons to Crane that upset her so much. It was the fear that one day Abbie would have to discuss her own personal history. Of course he knew some of it, but there were things she never shared, things she chose to ignore, or at least, tried to ignore. Jenny had filled in the gaps of a collective history, the specter that often still haunts, but also gave and gives strength, resilience and sometimes a bitter taste in one’s mouth. He was once a lost man, but now had been brought up to speed, just enough; to cross over the bridge into that place, where Abbie would never be seen as herself but only as a film negative. Would he be able to balance on the tightrope, or fall completely into the heady cruel place of default always insidious with its seductive fake smiles and privilege? It would and could if allowed trample their shared intimacy and history into dust. 

When Katrina was in the picture everything was fine. The intimacy Abbie and Crane shared was a deep abiding friendship, something they both needed. Anything else was buried deep only surfacing in the most extreme of circumstances. These past couple of years had changed everything. Ichabod and Katrina reunited, slowly realizing that they loved each other, but were not in love. It had been a hard thing for both parties to acknowledge. Jenny had become Katrina’s confidant, and if Abbie was not mistaken, perhaps something more. Jenny often consoling the woman on the bad nights they both had. Katrina however was a strong lady, more forthright than Crane more grounded, different upbringing, harsher life; no doubt, and it was she who ended the agony of their failing marriage by moving out of Corbin’s cabin and leaving Crane on his own. Katrina’s time in purgatory had left its mark. The woman would pace late into the night and quiet sobs reached Abbie’s ears. Katrina, much like her sister, both suffered from insomnia and general restlessness, and Abbie soon realized their shared experience of being locked away and often isolated gave them a natural bond. They both stayed at Abbie’s home sometimes but regularly took off for weeks at a time. They were now talking about moving to Ireland. Jenny and Katrina had gravitated toward each other, much as she gravitated toward Crane, ironic really considering. 

Crane was still an idealist, despite the hell they had gone through, despite being displaced in time, despite his ex-wife running wild with her sister, and Abbie kind of liked that about him. Their “courtship,” as he called it, moved at a slow but steady pace, both of them a bit gun shy. She was however painfully aware their ideas of proper dating etiquette were miles apart. They argued back and forth about what constituted lovemaking, yet when they touched it was…well frankly it left her feeling better and better each time. The doubts however still plagued her, and Jenny’s little info session and his quick departure from the room left her afraid of the reality of him staying in her time. The Twenty-First Century thought way too much of itself, loving a man far removed from it gave her a bit of perspective in a way. Abbie hugged herself lost in circular arguments inside her head. She felt herself nearly drowning in…

“The unchartered waters,” a voice whispered in her ear.

Crane had somehow snuck up on her. It said something about her state of mind that she hadn't heard him approach, and now he was reading her mind. She would remember to ask him about that later. 

He guided her to the couch and they faced each other.

“Miss Mills…Abbie, I have been remiss in my duties as a suitor and I have left you in the dark about my feelings and thoughts, which has made me a poor companion as of late. I can only beg your forgiveness on my short sightedness in this matter. “I vow never to abandon you again, Abigail Mills. My heart belongs to you. There are things I do not understand and never will completely, but do not ever think I do not see you or hear you. I too had concerns and doubts fears. I do not wish to be unworthy of your affections. I did not nor do I wish to be ignorant of all of who you are. You mean more to me than my life. Our differences make us whole beings unto ourselves; our coming together is a gift and a blessing. Have we not stood together at the gates of hell together and prevailed victorious."

Abbie looked into the eyes of the man she loved and for once truly believed

“Will you forgive me, Abbie?” Will you be my life’s companion? Will you be my wife?

“Look, Crane”

“It’s Ichabod" He said gently.

Abbie touched his face. He did not flinch, but moved in closer to the touch

“You have not answered my question, Abbie”

“Ichabod I…I’m …I’m"

Abbie looked at her friend, companion, lover, stroking his cheek.

“We could travel the world together, and discover its delights and foibles together” 

Abbie felt his long arms embracing her. She leaned against his chest and felt him relax slightly, when she returned his embrace. She held on tightly and whispered

“Yes.”


End file.
